I miss my Z, but I'll see him on Sunday. It was strange sleeping in his bed. �Our� bed alone. I slept ok though after I finished my 8 mile run on the treadmill last night at the gym. I was pretty tired so it wasn't too hard. I just wadded up his pillow next to me so it felt like he was there. I hope he is having a good trip climbing and that his new boots and crampons (sp?) server him well.

My lower calves and both of my ankles are really tight and sore, so I think I'm going to take today off. Plus I'm supposed to hang out with my girl friend tonight and she is planning on getting a little bit tipsy so I think that she might be crashing at my place, so I don't foresee me being able to sneak out to the gym or anything.

I was very close to not running last night. I waited and waited until 10 and then decided I didn't feel comfortable running outside without my body guard (z) so I went to the gym. I'm sure that would make him happy... ;) Then I was going to get up this morning and run. I actually woke up at 3:57am and 6:23am, but when I tried to walk around my aches and pains made me say ah forget it and went back to sleep.

I'm just about done with my new pack of pills which means that it's nearly TOM, so a bit of the extra weight that is making me feel really FAT is probably bloat. I haven't had it in a while, but I know that my breasts are tender as well, so the bloat is just another symptom that will subside after a while. Poor Z will have to wait until next week, which I know he is not happy about but he is very understanding. Gotta love that man! I'm very sore as well. Not sure if that is also a symptom, but it hurts - down there... Other than cramps. I'm wondering if all of the running and the backpacking last week along with the PH changes going on this week down there might have contributed to a yeast infection. I have no symptoms other than the soreness. I've actually been a bit sore during intercourse the last 3 nights, so I just figured that was part of TOM, but I'll just have to keep a close watch on it. I hate feeling all off. Plus I've got a mild case of breaking out going on so I feel fat, ugly, and sore from running and other sources. I'M A MESS!!! Oh well, I've got this weekend and next week to get right with myself. Patience grasshopper.

I talked to a guy I used to date who will be joining my group today. It should be interesting to work together. He's a really nice guy, he just wasn't Z, so things didn't work out, but he still wants to be friends. It's still weird ya know? I also ran into another guy I used to date a lunch today. What the heck. Two in the same day? Kinda weird. He was very polite and whatnot. He even invited me to have lunch with him and some other people that I work with. I took him up on it, but only stayed for a while, because we only have two other people in today and one hadn't eaten lunch yet and it was too freaking hot to sit outside! It was a little weird because we haven't talked at all for quite a while and now things are different. I'm seeing Z and he was dating some other chick from my company but it recently ended badly. I feel sorry for him. He really seemed to want to settle down too. Oh well. It was nice to know that we're still comfortable around each other and no one would know the difference I don't believe. I missed Z terribly though all of a sudden. I wish that I could have come back to my desk and emailed him or heard his voice on the phone. Silly I know but I did... I'll be going camping with him and a group of friends while Z is in Ireland so at least we can all hang out with out drama. That is good to know or else I wouldn�t go!

I'm looking forward to hanging out with my friend J tonight to have a girl night out, but I'm freaking tired. I better get some caffeine and quick!

TGIF!!!!

PAY DAY YEAH!!!

(Engaged 9/16/05)