Still here... Just been quietly reading everyone else�s updates heh :). I've been really weepy this week, but today I feel better. A friend suggested taking some St. John's Wart (sp?) during the winter months to help my mood naturally. I'm just so lonely now that L and the puppy are gone - even though it was my decision. Plus it gets so dark so soon and its so darn cold...

I've worked out every morning except the last couple of mornings, because it's been

1) snowing on and off

2) gym buddy has the flu

3) too tired, but I've gone when I've been this tired if not more tired before...

Things will get better. They sun is out and the leaves are on the ground and it looks so peaceful and clean outside. But I know it is FREEZZING out there heh.

I've given myself another "no weigh in day" pass. I don't think I've gained any weight, but I know I haven't lost any weight either, thus I would still be disappointed, ya know? I've been working out, but not really watching my portion sizes again... I will get back on track today, because I want to look good for my trip to Guam to visit my old best buddy from WWU on Dec. 2nd. I can not WAIT!!! Sun, sand, good food, and her company will be enough to snap me out of my funk for sure. I've been eating meals at mom's and spending the evenings watching TV or reading myself to sleep. Still not really sleep that well, but that will come.

I'm wearing my new size 9 JUNIORS lei jeans and I'm feeling fine. They are tight around my legs, fit nicely around my waist& butt, and they are bootlegged so they make my boots look really cute too. So all in all, today will be a good day. I'm going to have Korean BBQ with some friends tonight - if the snow permits, so that should be fun. I'm stressing about finances right now, but I've already worked out a new budget and split a couple of bills per paycheck that should start next month, so that too will fall into place. I feel like I'm on my way and hopefully the tears and heartache will be less in the future. Wish me luck...

-A

(Engaged 9/16/05)